# BabySleep.now > Evidence-Based Baby Sleep, Without Cry-It-Out ## Posts - [Breastsleeping: How Breastfed Babies Really Sleep](https://babysleep.now/breastsleeping-how-breastfed-babies-really-sleep/): Your baby finally falls asleep at the breast. Their body becomes heavier, their hands relax and you wait – just to be sure. Then you carefully try to put them down. Their eyes open almost immediately. Or perhaps your baby sleeps peacefully beside you but wakes again and again in their cot. They may take short naps, ask to breastfeed more often than you expected, or seem to notice the moment you move away. It is easy to look at all this and wonder: Why can’t my baby just sleep? But perhaps your baby is not sleeping badly at all. Perhaps […] - [Start with the problem, not the solution](https://babysleep.now/baby-sleep-problems/): An early extract from The Baby Sleep Handbook by Alexandra Kalmár. When you are exhausted, it is completely understandable to want someone to tell you what to do. My baby wakes every two hours. How do I stop it? My baby only sleeps for thirty minutes. How do I make the nap longer? My toddler suddenly refuses bedtime. What time should I put them to bed? Sleep advice often answers these questions by jumping straight to a solution: stop feeding to sleep, move the last feed earlier, teach independent settling, shorten the nap, lengthen the nap, change bedtime or follow a […] - [Why Won’t My 6-Week-Old Baby Sleep? When Everything Suddenly Changes](https://babysleep.now/6-week-old-baby-wont-sleep/): Around six weeks, many parents have the slightly bewildering feeling that someone has swapped their baby overnight. A baby who seemed to sleep almost anywhere a week or two ago may suddenly stay awake for longer, become harder to settle, wake the moment you put them down, fuss more in the evening, want to feed constantly or spend most of the day in your arms. Sometimes it can genuinely feel as though your baby has simply decided not to sleep. And this is often the point when parents start wondering what they have done wrong. Have I kept her awake too […] - [The Witching Hour in Babies: Why Evenings Can Be So Hard](https://babysleep.now/witching-hour-baby/): Your baby has been relatively content for most of the day. Then late afternoon arrives and suddenly nothing seems to work. They want to feed, then pull away. You walk around with them, they settle for a few minutes, then start crying again. They fall asleep in your arms, wake ten minutes later and want to feed again. You rock, bounce, cuddle, feed and walk around the house wondering what on earth happened to the baby you had at lunchtime. Welcome to what parents often call the witching hour – although, rather unfairly, it can last considerably longer than an hour. […] - [Responsive Bottle Feeding: Following Your Baby, Not the Clock](https://babysleep.now/responsive-bottle-feeding-following-your-baby-not-the-clock/): Bottle feeding is often presented as a fairly technical job. Choose the milk, sterilise the equipment, work out how much your baby should have, and keep an eye on how many millilitres disappear from the bottle. All of those practical things have their place. But feeding a baby is much more than getting the right amount of milk into them. Your baby is part of the feed too. They can tell you when they are hungry, when the milk is coming too quickly, when they need a pause and when they have had enough. They may want a larger feed at […] - [Why Does My Baby Fight Sleep?](https://babysleep.now/baby-fighting-sleep/): You know your baby is tired. They were yawning ten minutes ago, rubbing their eyes and starting to become a little less cheerful about life. You begin settling them, expecting sleep to follow. Instead, they suddenly seem to have discovered a second career. They wriggle, arch, turn away, want to feed and then do not want to feed, complain when you hold them and complain when you put them down. A toddler may become urgently interested in drinking water, finding a particular toy or discussing something that happened three days ago. It is very easy to interpret all of this as […] - [Do I Need to Sleep Train My Baby? What the Research Actually Tells Us](https://babysleep.now/do-i-need-to-sleep-train-my-baby/): If your baby wakes frequently, needs help falling asleep or wants you close at night, sooner or later somebody will probably suggest sleep training. Sometimes it is presented as one possible option. More often, it sounds like a developmental necessity: your baby needs to learn to self-soothe, needs to learn to fall asleep independently, or will never sleep well unless you teach them. That can create an enormous amount of pressure, particularly when you are already exhausted. So let me start with the most important part. No, you do not have to sleep train your baby. Sleep training is one way […] - [Bedsharing With a Baby: What Does the Evidence Actually Say?](https://babysleep.now/bedsharing-with-a-baby/): Few baby sleep topics become polarised as quickly as bedsharing. You may have been told that you should never bring your baby into your bed, under any circumstances. Or you may have heard the opposite: that sleeping beside your baby is biologically normal and therefore perfectly safe. Neither statement gives you the whole picture. Bedsharing is common, the circumstances in which families bedshare vary enormously, and the risk is not the same in every situation. That is exactly why I think we need to talk about it properly. Not because every family should bedshare. And not because every family should avoid […] - [Dummy, Pacifier or Thumb: What Does It Mean for Sleep?](https://babysleep.now/pacifier-dummy-thumb-baby-sleep/): Few baby sleep objects attract quite as much judgement as the dummy. Some parents are warned never to introduce one because it will interfere with breastfeeding. Others are told they should introduce one because it reduces the risk of SIDS. Then, once the baby likes it, somebody will inevitably warn them that they now need to get rid of it before it ruins their child’s teeth. Meanwhile, some babies reject every dummy offered to them and calmly use their own thumb instead, which has the inconvenient feature of being permanently attached. So rather than deciding that dummies are either good or […] - [White Noise for Baby Sleep: Helpful, Harmful or Neither?](https://babysleep.now/white-noise-for-babies/): White noise has become one of those baby sleep tools that can sound either essential or terrifying, depending on what you happen to read first. One person tells you that your baby needs it because the womb was noisy. Another warns that you could damage your baby’s hearing or interfere with brain development. Meanwhile, your baby may simply be sleeping beautifully beside a little machine making a noise remarkably similar to an extractor fan. So what do we actually know? White noise can help some babies settle or stay asleep, but it is not necessary for healthy sleep and it is […] - [Why Does My Baby Sleep Differently at Nursery or Daycare?](https://babysleep.now/baby-sleep-nursery-daycare/): One of the things that can feel surprisingly confusing when your baby starts nursery or spends part of the week with another caregiver is that their sleep may suddenly look completely different there. Perhaps your baby only naps on you at home but sleeps in a cot at nursery. Maybe they take one long nap there and three short ones with you. They may be rocked to sleep by somebody else even though they usually breastfeed to sleep at home, or they may barely sleep at childcare and then fall asleep almost as soon as you are reunited. Parents often worry […] - [Does My Baby Need a Strict Sleep Schedule?](https://babysleep.now/does-my-baby-need-a-strict-sleep-schedule/): Baby sleep advice has a strange tendency to become increasingly precise the longer you look at it. At first you are told roughly how much babies sleep. Then you find a sample routine. Before long, you are looking at a timetable telling you that your baby should nap at 9:15, feed at 10:30 and be asleep for the night at 7:00, while the baby in front of you has been awake since 5:40 and has just fallen asleep in the car. Schedules can be useful. Strict schedules are not the same thing as useful rhythms. Babies gradually develop more recognisable patterns […] - [How Do I Know When My Baby Is Ready to Drop a Nap?](https://babysleep.now/dropping-a-nap/): Nap transitions have an irritating habit of looking obvious only in retrospect. For weeks, everything can feel slightly wrong. The last nap takes forever to happen, bedtime moves later, yesterday your baby managed perfectly well on two naps and today they are falling asleep in the highchair at five o’clock. It is tempting to look for a clear answer: At what age should my baby drop a nap? There are approximate ages when particular nap patterns become more common, but I would not use a birthday as the reason to remove sleep. Babies gradually move from many daytime sleeps towards fewer, […] - [Should I Wake My Baby From a Nap?](https://babysleep.now/should-i-wake-my-baby-from-a-nap/): Few things feel more counterintuitive than waking a sleeping baby. You may have spent twenty minutes feeding, rocking, walking or negotiating with the universe to get them to sleep, and now somebody is suggesting that you deliberately wake them up. I understand the reluctance. If your baby is sleeping peacefully, there is usually no reason to wake them simply because a schedule says the nap has lasted long enough. Babies vary considerably in how much sleep they need and in how they distribute that sleep across the day and night. Some naturally take short naps, while others sometimes sleep for much […] - [Why Does My Baby Wake So Early?](https://babysleep.now/baby-waking-early/): There is something particularly painful about seeing 5:12 a.m. on the clock when your baby has decided that the night is over. At 2 a.m., at least everybody agrees that it is the middle of the night. At five, things become less clear. Your baby may be wide awake, smiling and completely ready to begin the day while you are still firmly of the opinion that morning should not exist for at least another hour. Early waking is one of the sleep questions I hear frequently, and one of the first things I want to establish is what we actually mean […] - [Split Nights: Why Is My Baby Wide Awake in the Middle of the Night?](https://babysleep.now/split-nights-baby/): There is a very particular kind of tiredness that comes from being awake with a baby at two in the morning who appears to have absolutely no intention of going back to sleep. They are not necessarily crying. Sometimes they are quite cheerful, which can make the whole thing feel even more unreasonable. You are lying there trying not to move or speak too much while your baby rolls around, feeds, practises a new sound, pulls at your hair or simply stares into the darkness as though this is now an entirely acceptable time to start the day. Parents often describe […] - [Is My Baby a ‘Bad Sleeper’? What Normal Baby Sleep Really Looks Like](https://babysleep.now/normal-baby-sleep/): Some babies seem to arrive in the world with an unexpected talent for sleep. They fall asleep fairly easily, tolerate being put down and give their parents longer stretches at night surprisingly early. Other babies wake at the slightest attempt to move them, nap for thirty minutes, want help every time they fall asleep and appear to have missed the memo explaining that babies are supposed to spend quite a lot of their time sleeping. It is very easy for the first baby to become known as a “good sleeper” and the second as a “bad sleeper”. I hear these descriptions […] - [When Do Babies Actually Sleep Through the Night?](https://babysleep.now/when-do-babies-sleep-through-the-night/): “Is your baby sleeping through yet?” It is one of those questions people seem to start asking surprisingly early. Sometimes it is just conversation, but when you are the one getting up several times a night, it can land differently. If other babies in your antenatal group are apparently sleeping from seven until seven while yours still wakes at midnight, two, four and five-thirty, it is very easy to start wondering whether something has gone wrong. The difficulty is that “sleeping through the night” does not have one agreed meaning, and the way we use the phrase in everyday conversation is […] - [Contact Naps: Do I Need to Stop My Baby Sleeping on Me?](https://babysleep.now/contact-naps/): Your baby sleeps beautifully on you and wakes three minutes after you put them down. Is this something you need to change — or simply something babies often do? There is a particular kind of optimism involved in transferring a sleeping baby. You wait until they look completely gone. The arm is floppy. The breathing has changed. Surely this is it. You stand up slowly, walk towards the cot, lower them with the concentration of someone defusing a bomb, keep one hand on their chest for a little longer, then begin removing your fingers one by one. Eyes open. If your […] - [Do You Really Need to Put Your Baby Down Drowsy but Awake?](https://babysleep.now/drowsy-but-awake/): If you have spent any time reading baby sleep advice, you have probably met drowsy but awake. Possibly many, many times. The idea sounds perfectly reasonable. You feed, rock or cuddle your baby until they are lovely and sleepy, then — at exactly the right moment — place them gently in the cot. Not asleep, obviously. Not properly awake either. Just drowsy enough to accept the transfer and awake enough to finish falling asleep independently. There is apparently a tiny magical state somewhere between the two, and all you have to do is find it. Some babies really do this. You […] - [Are Sleep Associations Really a Problem?](https://babysleep.now/baby-sleep-associations/): Are Sleep Associations Really a Problem? If your baby falls asleep breastfeeding, rocking, cuddling, being carried or lying beside you, there is a good chance somebody has warned you not to let them “get used to it”. This phrase has followed parents around for years. Be careful, or they’ll always need it. Usually it comes with a perfectly logical-sounding explanation. Your baby falls asleep with the breast, rocking or your body close by, wakes between sleep cycles, notices that the original conditions have changed, and then needs you to recreate them. Therefore, the argument goes, the thing that helped your baby […] - [Does My Baby Need to Learn to Self-Soothe?](https://babysleep.now/does-my-baby-need-to-learn-to-self-soothe/): “Your baby needs to learn to self-soothe.” It is one of those phrases that sounds so established that we rarely stop to ask what it actually means. Sometimes self-soothing means falling asleep without being fed, rocked, held or otherwise helped. Sometimes it means waking during the night and returning to sleep without signalling for you. And sometimes the term is used as though it describes something much bigger: a baby’s ability to regulate their own emotions and nervous system. Those are not the same thing. That distinction matters, because once they are bundled together, a very persuasive story emerges: if you […] - [Why Does My Baby Only Nap for 30 Minutes?](https://babysleep.now/why-does-my-baby-only-nap-for-30-minutes/): “My baby only naps for thirty minutes.” It is one of the most common worries I hear from parents. Sometimes the nap is twenty minutes. Sometimes forty. And almost always the next question is some version of: Surely that can’t be enough? It is understandable. We tend to imagine good sleep as long, deep and uninterrupted, so a short nap can look unfinished — especially if you have just spent longer getting your baby to sleep than they actually stayed asleep. But a short nap, by itself, does not tell us that anything has gone wrong. During infancy, sleep is still […] - [Wake Windows: Helpful Guide or Another Thing to Worry About?](https://babysleep.now/wake-windows-helpful-guide-overtiredness/): If you have a baby, there is a good chance you have heard about wake windows. You may have been told that a three-month-old should stay awake for a certain number of minutes, that a six-month-old should manage a little longer, and that if you miss the “right” moment, your baby will become overtired. Then the clock starts running. Your baby wakes from a nap and you mentally start counting. Ninety minutes. Two hours. Two hours and fifteen. You watch for yawns, eye rubbing, staring into the distance. You wonder whether to leave the café, abandon lunch, cut the walk short […] - [Is Feeding Your Baby to Sleep Really a Bad Habit?](https://babysleep.now/is-feeding-your-baby-to-sleep-really-a-bad-habit/): If your baby regularly falls asleep while breastfeeding or having a bottle, there is a good chance that at some point somebody will tell you to stop. Perhaps you have heard that feeding to sleep creates a “bad sleep association”. That your baby will become dependent on it. That every time they move between sleep cycles, they will look for exactly the same conditions they had when they fell asleep. Or that if you want longer stretches of sleep, you first need to teach your baby to fall asleep independently. It sounds logical. But the evidence is considerably more complicated than […] - [My Baby Wakes Every Two Hours. Is Something Wrong?](https://babysleep.now/my-baby-wakes-every-two-hours/): If your baby wakes every two hours — or sometimes even more often — it is very easy to assume that something has gone wrong. Perhaps you have been told that your baby should be sleeping longer stretches by now. Maybe somebody else’s baby is already “sleeping through”. Or perhaps you have searched online and found a long list of possible explanations: your baby is overtired, undertired, hungry, not hungry, napping too much, napping too little, going to bed too early, going to bed too late, feeding to sleep or relying on a “sleep association”. Before you change anything, there is […] ## Pages - [Breastsleeping: What It Means and How Breastfed Babies Really Sleep](https://babysleep.now/breastsleeping/) - [You’re in! 😊](https://babysleep.now/welcome/): Thanks for joining me. 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